Lately I have really been teaching myself to rest. To just stop myself from trying to plan whats next or think up where God could be leading us. Since losing Goldie this summer our “plan” was shaken up. We thought we would be a family of 2 girls close together, be out of the baby phase soon and start travelling as a family. Obviously God had a different path for our family, and so it has taught me in a big way that we don’t know what lies ahead of us.
I find myself often reminding God that we are open to his plan, to lead us down his path, sort of expecting him to appear in my bedroom and tell us to move to Africa and sell everything we own or something drastic like that. As I was praying for this one night while driving home I had an overwhelming sense of the need to rest, to know that God has a plan. He knows we are willing to follow him and didn’t forget. He doesn’t need me to remind him, he needs me to rest, trust, and be still. I think something just as bold as moving across the world can be not making plans at all. Not obsessing over the month you hope to conceive, the home or job you hope to have in 5 years, but knowing that those things are all up for grabs. Not that I feel we should wander around aimlessly, I love setting goals and God asks us to be hard workers. But having our hearts in the right place can be a challenge, I’m working on laying in bed at night and feeling true rest, keeping my mind from racing around about all the things I try to control.
“I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” John 16:33